Social justice warrior bravely vandalizes Virginia pro-life pregnancy center at 3am

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CULPEPER, Virginia: A social justice warrior bravely vandalized Culpeper Pregnancy Center in the early hours of Friday, Feb 1.

At 3.30 am, Culpeper police arrived at the scene to discover “FAKE” and “YOU HATE WOMEN” spray painted on their signs, with “JESUS HATES THIS SH*T” spray painted on the wall.  In addition, a front window had been smashed by a rock.

The vandalism of this Christian non-profit women’s center follows only days after a debate over late-term abortion in the state capital sparked controversy nationwide.  Delegate Kathy Tran’s REPEAL Act allows for the killing of a baby up to the beginning of labor and Gov Ralph Northam outlined how the process of infanticide would work in practice.

President and COO DJ Carter said, “You know I’m really glad that this brave young individual defaced our sign as it’s made me think about what we do here – I mean, they’re right – how can we call ourselves a pregnancy and women’s center when we don’t offer abortions?  Sure we have certified medical staff and help women in times of pregnancy crisis, those with STIs and STDs and all sorts. Sure, we’ve treated women in this community for 20 and we give them all the information about carrying their baby, abortion and adoption.  But Planned Parenthood is right – how can we be trusted to help women if we don’t kill babies.”

DJ Carter added, “As a result of this experience we’re changing our name to Thrive Women’s Healthcare and will start offering abortions straight away – as women only thrive when they kill their own children.  I mean they really are an inconvenience to our lives anyway – and no-one would want to adopt something that will make their life harder – so killing the child is the only sensible choice.”

Well you heard it at the Cee first.  Planned Parenthood’s campaign is changing women’s lives in this rural farming community for the better.

Not so much for the babies though. 

PS This is satire – the centre is wisely carrying on the excellent godly work it has been doing for the last 20 years.  And spray paint and a rock is not going to change that, even if it is done by a brave individual.

Reporter: John Spencer aka Not the Bible

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